Rain King

Currently relevant.

That’s more like it, sun.

The only hardware store for me.

It was kind of hard to not order the third entry from the bottom.

Now THAT is a motherfucking slice of pizza.

The best part about the Nightmare remake was Doug showing up in costume (“I didn’t even plan it” - yeah, sure, whatever). The worst part was everything.

It was like a shot-for-shot remake of the first one, except less inspired. Some of the nightmares were scary, but that’s because they were just retreads of the first movie and the first movie was scary. It brought nothing else to the table. Even the CG was bad because the whole “Freddy pushing through the bedroom wall” bit looks better as a practical effect anyway.

Let’s put an end to this trend of making emobrats the protagonists, and let’s also make a little more effort to establish the survivor girl character next time. The Friday the 13th remake recognized its source material and had fun with it. This remake just gussied its predecessor up a little bit, like when you’d copy a friend’s homework then make minor alterations to try and pass it off as something different.

I feel betrayed after all the effort I put in rounding up the best moments the series had to offer for y’all. New discovery: crow tastes like shit.

Top of Winnetka.

I’m not the only one who sees this, right? RIGHT!?

Paradox.